Dear [Insert delivery service name here],
I apologize for consistently answering the door in all manner of dishevelment, especially at the holiday season. Is it my fault I’m still in my PJs at 10 am? Probably. You really shouldn’t have to see anyone in this condition (mismatched pajamas, dirty hair, no makeup, etc.). It’s likely not [...]
Continue reading 'Open Letter to FedEx, UPS, and USPS' »
New verb alert: “pinning.” In this context it means to put a virtual pin in your interests on the site Pinterest. In a few weeks, I’m sure I’ll be thinking I can’t look at this site anymore. It fills my head with ideas I’ll never execute, recipes I’ll never cook, and fashions I’ll never buy, [...]
Continue reading 'Put a Pin in It!' »
The weirdest thing about getting old is that deep down you don’t realize you are. A series of unrelenting little episodes reminds you on a daily basis. I’m often shocked when I read that a celebrity I thought was a contemporary is actually much younger than I am. That happens a lot. And I almost [...]
Continue reading 'For 47' »
Not since the Wicked Witch of the West melted have I been happy about a death. Although it has happened before, it’s still strange to see people celebrating someone being killed, even if that person was evil incarnate. Just an observation. But in thinking about it, I started to think about who is the MOST [...]
Continue reading 'Ding Dong' »
I tried to turn a deaf ear when a recent Apple advertisement used the word “funner” to describe an iPod. Children are listening to this, I thought. Adults, okay most adults, know that “funner” is not correct, but a new generation may not. I still refuse to believe in “impactful” as a word, and I’m [...]
Continue reading 'Grammatical Terrorism' »
The other night I saw a preview of Off the Map, a new TV show about doctors doing philanthropical work in a tropical locale. I had also seen a print ad for it. Both the preview and the ad looked identical to Lost, right down to the lookalike characters. Seriously? They made a hybrid of [...]
Continue reading 'Original Spin' »
“Sen. John Ensign (R-Nev.) said he voted against the first responders bill because Republicans had threatened to vote against everything until tax cuts for the rich were extended and a measure to fund the government was passed.”
I try not to comment on politics until I’m solidly outraged. The sentence above confuses me beyond [...]
Continue reading 'Can Someone Explain this to Me?' »
Okay, I know it’s ripped from the headlines, but this Twitter message from a clearly upset Steve Johnson of the Buffalo Bills is too good to let go by. After fumbling a game-winning pass, Johnson tweeted the following message, apparently to God.
I PRAISE YOU 24/7!!!!!! AND THIS HOW YOU DO ME!!!!! YOU EXPECT ME TO [...]
Continue reading 'God Hates the Bills' »
It’s fall, and therefore time to clear off my DVR for new shows. It occurred to me that some of the shows I’d saved were probably available on YouTube. These visits from Dennis Quaid on Ellen are no longer taking up space courtesy of YouTube, plus I can share them. They are hilarious. What a [...]
Continue reading 'Dennis Quaid is Here!' »
Fall is so beautiful, with its perfect weather and vibrant colors. It would beat out spring as my favorite season if it weren’t for one thing — spiders. I can barely type the word, as it conjures visions of those creepy eight-legged freaks. This is the time when “they” decide to move in with us, [...]
Continue reading 'Bad Time for Arachnophobes' »
